She had the jitters
She had the flu
She showed up late
She missed her cue
She kicked the director
She screamed at the crew
And tripped on a prop
And fell in some goo
And ripped her costume
A place or two
Then she forgot
A line she knew
And went “Meow” 
Instead of “Moo” 
She heard ‘em giggle 
She heard ‘em boo 
The programs sailed 
The popcorn flew 
As she stomped offstage 
With a boo-hoo-hoo 
The fringe of the curtain 
Got caught in her shoe 
The set crashed down 
The lights did too 
Maybe that’s why 
she didn’t want to do 
An interview.